Tara on Tour

Tara is the female Buddha of compassion and wisdom. This is a webdiary of a journey inspired by Tara....

Name:
Location: Edinburgh, United Kingdom

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Musings...

Tara on Tour

I woke up feeling anxious this morning - which usually makes me want to cry, hide or run away! However, I realised this was an opportunity to take a good look into the nature of this anxiety and fear: after all, the very essence of Tara is protection from fear.

In many spiritual teachings, I've heard the same message: there are really only two forces at play within us - love and fear. Love is our true nature and fear is everything else, created and sustained by our ego. The fundamental problem with the human condition is our belief that we have an independent, self-existing, separate, fixed "I" .... which we need to feed, clothe, look after, provide entertainment for, reproduce, protect from pain, steer towards pleasure. We are responsible for the survival of ourselves, in the form that we perceive ourselves. We become rather attached to ourselves, and attached to what we believe is good for us and averse to what we believe is harmful.

This is all very sensible at face value. However, if we consider the consequences of millions of "I"s on the planet trying to secure their individual survival and happiness, there are many reasons why this view and behaviour is problematic. If resources are abundant, there is more likely to be relative harmony between individuals, but when they run out or are threatened, competitiveness and conflict increase. If I believe that I need all these things to survive, then I am going to be afraid if I don't have them - and resent you if you do have them. This seed of aggression towards you may grow until I truly believe I have to get rid of you somehow, or steal from you, in order to protect my own interests.

Even in times of abundance, because of this root drive to live according to the ego's belief system, my needs will just grow and grow until yesterday's luxury has become today's necessity. Greed spirals out of control until we're living in a kind of madness, obsessed with materialism, consuming all the time, blaming everyone "in power" for not giving us everything we want or for anything that doesn't work out for us.... and actually, for all that we have, utterly miserable.
Ignoring the fact that half the world's population is dying through famine, poverty and disease.

So - fear is really a very big problem. Acutely uncomfortable to experience and therefore hidden within other emotions such as anger, pride, jealousy. Fear makes us aware of our vulnerability and, without compassion and kindness, this can be really unpleasant.

But when we feel fear - raw, neat fear - we are in touch with something in a more direct, naked way. Which seems to bring us closer to the truth of who we really are. We are vulnerable. We are subject to uncontrollable forces of change that include ageing, sickness, death and losses of many kinds. Everything that exists is impermanent. So to rely on a lie such as the one that the ego perpetuates is very dangerous and very unwise. We suffer. We cause suffering to others.

When Buddhism talks of wisdom, it is referring to the state of innate "knowing" where the truth of existence and reality is no longer obscured. Tara is the essence of wisdom, the embodiment of wisdom when in form. It is through wisdom that all fear falls away - because we see things the way they really are, and in that view there is nothing to fear.

This is why it has always made sense to me to follow such a path. Buddhism works for me, but other traditions offer similar teaching and lead to the same "goal" . There a selfishness in it: I don't want to suffer..... but perhaps it's a wiser selfishness that some other kinds! I also appreciate that, if I were to truly understand the nature of myself, I wouldn't be afraid to suffer. I'd see the illusion of self and suffering, and this would liberate me from the kind of identification that blocks the all-pervading reality of compassion, peace and joy.

I have a very long way to go... but experiencing the fear of leaving home, losing a home and heading out into the world without really knowing where I'm going or what is going to happen, reminds me of the value of a spiritual path that can support us through major changes and uncertainties. Complacency and pride are fickle friends in a world where nothing is really as it seems...

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Second Tara


Tara on Tour

Last few days of having a home...not sure what it's going to be like being without one, but I'll get used to it. The next leg of the journey begins on Sunday, and the second Tara will be placed during the next two weeks - somewhere in Scotland.

The second Tara protects from 'earth-related disasters' and from the negative emotion of pride. Because of the nature of interdependence, nothing in the external world exists separately from us and all the Taras are described as simultaneously protecting us from external and internal forces of destruction and suffering. Earth-related disasters are obvious in the form of earthquakes, volcanoes, landslides, but it could be argued that what we are all facing now, as climate chaos increases, is an earth-related disaster on a massive scale. It is hard to see the link between human activity and shifting plates deep within the Earth's structure, but not so hard to see the direct link between the burning of fossil fuels, increased carbon dioxide levels and global warming.... leading to melting ice caps, rising sea levels, enlarged areas of desert, severe drought, dying vegetation, and on and on. If we are caught in the negative state of pride, believing in a kind of Western, capitalist superiority, refusing to see how damaging our actions can be, refusing to accept what's happening and refusing to see that we need to change, then we are directly contributing to the death of our planet. And ourselves in the process.

During the travels with the second Tara, I'll be exploring and finding out more about what's happening to the Earth, what is causing these problems and the things we can do - and are being done - to restore the balance and bring us back into harmonious relationship with our home. Perhaps leaving the safety and security of a physical home in bricks and mortar will open my eyes to the deeper relationship I have, we all have, with this planet as home.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Lindisfarne





Monday, May 22, 2006

First Tara...



Every year I pay a visit to Holy Island Lindisfarne, in the most north-easterly corner of England. I set off there for the weekend and - quite unexpectedly - realised when I was there that this was the beginning of the Tara Trail...

It was here that two remarkable men came to teach the Christian message in the 7th Century: Aidan and his successor, Cuthbert. The Northumbrian folk of the time were considered to be "barbarians" and had refused all previous attempts to be converted to Christianity - but Aidan, an Irish monk sent out from Iona in Scotland, had been successful in his mission and had established a flourishing religious community on Lindisfarne. It was Cuthbert, however, who made the greatest impression on the people and who, even today, attracts pilgrims from far and wide.

His story was written down by the great Benedictine scholar, Bede and this is why we know so much about him now. As a young man, he worked as a shepherd on the mainland across from Lindisfarne. One night he saw a vision: angels appeared to come down from the sky and returned, carrying something in their wings. Aidan died that same night, resting against the walls of Lindisfarne Priory, and when Cuthbert was told of this, his resolve was immediate. He went straight to Melrose Abbey, where he announced his intention to become a monk and to commit his life to Christ. The Abbot of Melrose, Boisil, welcomed him warmly and saw unusual potential in this young man from the beginning. When the plague hit the monastery, Boisil died and Cuthbert was spared - he came to Lindisfarne (perhaps using the now famous pilgrim route, St Cuthbert's Way) and was made Abbot. He was greatly loved and respected by the people and the Church - gentle, devout, steadfast, strong. Stories recount how he would stand all night in prayer, with his feet in the sea, warmed by otters that emerged from the freezing waters.

As his popularity grew, so Cuthbert began to yearn for greater solitude and privacy - not so much to retreat from the world, as to draw closer to God and to God alone. His first hermitage was built on a small part of the island that was cut off by the tides for several hours of each day. Known as St Cuthbert's Isle, it looks out over the mainland and over the Farne Islands, which were to become his home in later years.

It's on this Isle that the first Tara has been placed. This particular Tara is peaceful - white in colour and serene in countenance. She brings harmony and she pacifies suffering through peaceful means. The island is a haven of natural peace and this, together with its rich spiritual heritage, seems an appropriate home for this Tara.

In leaving her here, I reflected on the personal significance of this site. My own spiritual awakening happened through Christ and took place in my 20's; Lindisfarne was one of the first places I came to on retreat and I felt a sense of "home" here that has never changed. Truly a place where "the veil between God and Man grows thin", it has effortlessly pulled me into an inner experience of God that has given peace, joy, inspiration, direction and faith.

My interest in Buddhism was not through disillusionment with Christianity, but was through wanting to go deeper into the mysteries of faith, wanting to find a way to get back to a particular experience I'd had that completely changed my life. I'd experienced, one night in a vision, a personal encounter with Christ and been quite literally overwhelmed by the love and compassion pouring from his eyes - it had left me in a state of bliss and of absolute peace for several days, and had given me a taste of something I knew I would never find on earth. So perfect was it, and so completely and utterly fulfilling, there was no real choice but to spend the rest of this life finding a way to be truly one with that Love.

When I encountered the Buddhist teachings, and particularly those of the more mystical Vajrayana or Tantric school, I realised that this state of bliss was not dissimilar from the experience of enlightenment, the end of suffering, the flowering of the full potential as human beings. And that there were specific methods, a very clear path and highly qualified teachers..all of which could support and guide me on this journey to full awakening.

To some degree I had to leave Christianity in order to follow the Buddhist path: it was just too confusing to follow them both. But in my heart of hearts, I could never completely leave because I could never deny or turn my back on that experience of meeting Christ. If that is what happened. It seemed very appropriate, therefore, to remember and honour these roots by leaving Tara in a quintessentially Christian place. Sitting in the ruined remains of St Cuthbert's hermitage, I was reminded of the unity of all faiths, and also the marriage of the masculine and the feminine. It is so easy to focus too narrowly and to become convinced that the path we resonate with is the only true path: it may be the right path for one person, but that doesn't necessarily mean it's right for everyone. In the end there is no division, there is no conflict, no separation - all of that is human and born of our human condition. There is only the One, and by whatever name it is called, through whatever tradition we seek it, I really believe it is the same truth, the same essence. We are wise to remember our equality and our sameness, even as we celebrate and respect our diversity and differences.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Preparing...

Well, it's just taken me half an hour to work out to get back into this blog.....such is my natural affinity with technology. For a brief moment, I feared the entire epic odyssey was going to be limited to a one-page introduction and that you'd be left dangling on a cliff-edge wondering whether I'd dissolved into emptiness before I'd even left Edinburgh. This might of course be a safer, less expensive and more rapid path to Enlightenment, but for the time being I appear to still have ordinary form.

Today, I've been researching video cameras. The sales rep was a very enthusastic young man, who jumped up and down at the prospect of my buying a MAC computer to facilitate editing my own film.... spat on the floor and said it was all a question of image.... "they just look gorgeous. I don't want to be sexist but it used to be just women who went for the image, but now it's men as well. No one thinks about technology or quality anymore". Hmmmmmmmm.........

I think I'm going to buy a Mac.

Monday, May 15, 2006

Introduction......


Hello.... it's pouring with rain here in Edinburgh, but the leaves on the trees are so lush and the air is dripping with the unfolding of new life. I'm planning. Preparing for the trip that begins at the end of May. Not that I really know where I'm going......

This is a journey of inspiration. You know that wonderful experience when your mind is quite calmly doing its own thing and then...whoosh!....some bright idea pops in and you feel a great upsurge of energy. So easy to dismiss these moments, but when I'm free enough to pay attention, they become clues on a path, lights in the darkness of the unknown.

This is a mad idea really. Set out from home base in Edinburgh, with no idea where you're going, and take with you 20 small statues of Tara, a video camera, passport and dictaphone. Take these Taras to wherever in the world you are "instructed" to go. Your instructions will come through spiritual practice, intuition and coincidence. Have complete faith and live the journey with the intention of doing Tara's will.

OK!

Why 20 small statues? Well, the Tibetan Buddhist deity of Green Tara is described as having an entourage of 20 other Taras - each one having her own particular activity in the general field of fearless compassion and liberation from suffering. Whilst the central figure of Green Tara embodies all the qualities and activities of all the Buddhas, it can be helpful to pray to a specific Tara if there is a very specific problem.

So - that's just a bit of background. Enough for today.